Adopting a child is an experience that promises to bring great joy as it changes a couple or individual’s life forever. But what happens if the mother of that child wants to endorse their child? Those are the issues that many adopting parents and birth-right mothers are facing today. Many biological mothers want their child back. There are many concerns for adopting parents to know- that there is the possibly that the birth mother may file for the child. As a birth mother or the adopting parent one must realize consequences that could lay ahead.
The legal and social transfer of all parental right, responsibilities, and roles from one parent or parents, usually biological, to a nonbiological parent or parents is the definition of adoption. In such a transfer, adoptive parents accept the same rights and responsibilities as the child’s birth parents would have had, while the child becomes a member of a family that provides the social, emotional, and physical nurturing that children needs to grow up to be healthy, functioning adults. But there are some legal issues or opinions that can lead to a halting backfire in the adoption process. But, as the biological parent(s) and adopting parent(s), they must be ready for the quickly, approaching pros and cons.
Throughout the adoption journey, the gardein must be prepared and know what is best for them and their child. There are many positive feedbacks to adoption. Children are in need of adoption because some birth parents are unable or unavailable to provide adequately for the needs of their child. Birth parents may feel they cannot take on the responsibility of an unplanned child because they are too young or because they are financially or emotionally unable to provide proper care. They do not feel ready or able to be good parents. Most adopting parents, although, feel confident that most birth-right mothers will not seize their child back. Chris Intagliata, a mother of two adopted children advises that ” It [is] important to ask yourself what you can handle. If you feel you can handle everything, that’s a good attitude.” Those are important notions adopting parents must do. Most of the time adopting parents can handle the task but some times it backfires when the biological mother or couple want the baby back.
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Statistics show that the vast majority of independent adoptions in California are completed without a hitch; less that 2 percent are even contested. But when an adoption is contested, the anguish felt by both the adoptive and birth parents is unimaginable. Linda Ribordy, a family specialist who represented a birth mother in a legal case says that “if a birth mother changes her mind, it’s automatic that they get the baby back.” But the adopting parents feel furiously and emotionally different. “We have no legal status, no legal rights, none,” says Inger Bischofberger. “But he calls me Mama. The only thing that keeps me going is that I can’t turn my back on him, I can’t just walk away from him because all the grownups in his life have messed up.”
Birth mothers shouldn’t gain their child back if they are not financially ready. Usually greed and emotions will stand in there way and they will want their child back. But many children as they grow older question, asking – “Why me?” or “Why did my mom put me up for adoption?” Sometimes the biological mother might fell that her child will hate her as he/she grows older and never visit her. The birth mother should really think about adoption seriously before putting the child up or before trying to regain their child back. The process is both financially and emotionally critical. The lesson learned in the issue of adoption is not to have a child. Whether it is premarital sex, age, or financial or emotional problems- one must be prepared for the consequences ahead.
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