Self help is a process in which an individual improves or helps without seeking assistance
from others. It is based upon support groups, self reliance or available public information.
The potential benefits of self help groups are that professionals may not be able to provide include friendship, emotional support, experiential knowledge, identity, meaningful roles, and a sense of belonging (“Self Help”).
Assertiveness is a useful self help tool which I have used to solve specific problems. I was a
passive person who would always remain silent so as not to displease people. I would always take an inferior position as I believed that it would minimize any potential conflict. Obviously this was a weak approach that was bad for my self esteem. My rights were being transformed into favors which could be granted or denied irrespective of reason or right. What eventually changed me was when I got a job as a Customer support representative at an ISP. It was here that I learned how to be assertive.
I was taught that in customer services being aggressive or passive creates a negative impression. Being assertive is the best way to tackle difficult clients.
A University of Illinois Web site defines assertiveness as “the ability to express yourself without violating the rights of others. It is appropriately direct, open, and honest communication, which is self-enhancing and expressive.” Assertiveness requires a change in attitude as well as a change in behavior. Our interaction is normally determined by social status. Being assertive helps our voices, opinions, views and values to be heard in society. It ensures that we have clearly stated our views without worrying about other looking foolish or fear of negative consequences. Being assertive carries many advantages. This includes personal rights, values, beliefs, opinions, feelings and information. An assertive person focuses on solving problems. An assertive person can express his opinions and feelings clearly. Such a person clearly refuses anything in a way which does not offend the other person. Assertive persons do not make commitments if they are unable to perform that task. They do not try to please everyone. They rarely display hesitation in asking for information or making mistakes.
The Business plan on Support Individuals To Live At Home
1.1 When we have to support an individual to live at home (supported living) this can benefit an individual service users because support can helps promote and encouraging them to be more independence. The service users gain a greater sense of normality, they will have more time to spent with loved ones or more likely to get visits from friends and family, they will be able to maintain a little ...
Assertiveness does not lead others to blindly follow whatever you say. According to an article in TPR Publishing you can’t expect that others will agree with all your decisions. Your goal is only to have them behave on the job in accord with such decisions. Once you reach a decision, do not be sidetracked or worn down (“How to Make Assertiveness Pay Off in Dealing With Employees”).
Whenever I am faced with a difficult person or a troublesome situation I am very specific about time and actions. I avoid making general accusations. I try to be firm and strong. I try to explain to the person about the inappropriate behavior and enlighten him about what should start. I take the other person’s needs in consideration and ensure that my requests are reasonable. When we are faced with criticism we normally fight back by being angry, sarcastic, crying or pretending to ignore the criticism. “Acknowledging the truth of the criticism, agreeing with part of the criticism and disregarding all disagreements, asking for clarification” are the kinds of approach which are recommended (Tucker-Ladd ).
Anyone can be assertive. The following steps should be taken when faced with a difficult
person:
1. Meet the person to discuss any problems
2. Discuss the problem in an unbiased way
3. Make sure that your conclusion or judgment is correct
The Term Paper on Criticism Philosophy
Not too many people can listen none defensively, or none antagonistically, to criticism. And very few of those who listen admit it when they see that they are wrong. The thing is, we think that admission of guilt, or of being wrong, or that we have made a mistake, is a sign of weakness. Yet true failure is repeatedly refusing to see your faults. Learning to listen to criticism is a life skill that ...
4. Describe your feelings and explain them
Being fearful is a feature of passive people. An assertive person is always in control of
himself. Being assertive means maintaining your concentration. Looking directly into the
other’s eyes, paying close attention and remaining focused ensures that you are being
assertive. “If you stare directly into the other person’s eyes all the time, you’ll make
that person uncomfortable. Instead, focus on an imaginary triangle formed by the
center of the person’s mouth and the outside corners of the eyes. Only occasionally
should you look directly into the eyes.” Different situations demand the use of
innumerable personalities available to us. We need to have a strong belief in ourselves.
At times we can talk about the specifics rather than speaking generally. “Strategy sets
up one idea, into which everything else has to fit. Tactics means coming up with new
ideas under fire”.
Assertiveness increases the likelihood of people helping us and if they are unable to help
us they still remain friends. It helps you in making better decisions. It gives you a control
of your life. It also has a positive effect on relationships because it minimizes conflicts,
fosters respect and promotes growth in life.
Works Cited
“Self Help” APA Dictionary of Psychology, 1st ed
29 Jul 2007
“How to Make Assertiveness Pay Off in Dealing With Employees.” Editorial TPR Publishing (May 1991):14
Tucker-Ladd, Dr. Clayton E. “Practice giving assertive responses.” Psychological Self-Help. 29 Jul 2007
