Last April, a giant news story was on every news channel and was on the covers of many newspapers and magazines for weeks. This nightmare of the Columbine massacre impacted citizens across the nation. What compelled Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, two young teenage boys, to open fire on an innocent high school, killing thirteen people and then, killing themselves? What were they thinking? Who is to blame? Do we blame the music they listened to, the video games they played, the high school cliques they were not a part of? No one may ever know who or what is to blame, but one group of parents interviewed by 20/20 claim to have an explanation for these seemingly unexplainable phenomena. They say the answer lies with the parents and their method of parenting. This group of guardians suggest a type of child rearing called attachment parenting. ?They believe the style of parenting they practice will inoculate their children against ever becoming troubled? (1).
Attachment parenting is a style of parenting in which the mother and father spend as much as time as possible with the baby, ?physically connected?? to the child. ?While other parents use the help of walkers, playpens, even strollers to give themselves a little down time, 11-month-old Maddox McQuay,? one of the children being profiled by 20/20, ?has never set foot in one. The bulk of her short life has been spent in a device called a sling, an indispensable second appendage for attachment parents? (3).
The Term Paper on Cultural Differences in Parent-Child Communication
Today’s children face more diversity than their parents were when they were at the same age. The cultural differences in how the parents deal and communicate with their children around the world are a great challenge. Parent’s involvement in their children’s literacy and communication either in school, home or community will be effective through communication strategies and awareness about ...
This device resembles a sling for a broken arm, yet for a baby. Allowing the parent to take care of his or her daily chores and errands while having the baby physically attached, a sling proves to be very useful.
Another aspect of attachment parenting involves the sleeping arrangements of the family. Since a requirement of this style of child rearing is to be as close as possible, the only logical answer for these parents is to have the whole family sleep in the same bed or at least in the same bedroom. In addition to the parents being physically bonded to their children and the family sleeping together, these mothers breast feed their children for as long as possible or at least until the minimum of two years of age. ?The Bedrakas,? interviewed by 20/20, ?says it has done wonders for their daughter, Veronica,? who will be five years old next month and is still continuing to breast-feed (4).
According to the advocates of attachment parenting, ?it?s what parents would naturally do in the absence of baby books and doctors telling them what to do? (2).
But, the authors of baby books and the doctors are the experts. They have conducted numerous studies on the many aspects of child development and have the child?s best interest in mind. Equally concerned with the well being of children, the government issued a warning against co-sleeping, a fundamental component of attachment parenting. Recently, Dr. Clifford Nelson, a forensic pathologist for the Oregon State Medical Examiners Office, conducted a study of 651 cases ?originally classified as sudden unexpected infant death?. Of the 651 cases, 183 occurred in a co-sleeping situation (5).
The infants, sleeping in their own beds, possibly would have prevented 183 deaths. With such an extreme focus on the parents being ?physically connected? to the child, is it feasible for both parents to work? Dr. William Sears, a supporter of attachment parenting, told Dr. Snyderman that, ?Lots of moms have the type of jobs that they can wear their babies to work ? a clerk in a toy store?a real estate agent? (7).
Childrens Beauty Pageants Children Child Parents
The Darker Side of Children's Beauty Pageants It's 7: OO A. M. on a Saturday, kids everywhere are just waking up ready to watch their favorite line up of Saturday morning cartoons. Marie, a four year old child, is preparing for her long weekend of make-up, hairspray, and gowns. Marie is one of many children who are forced by over-demanding parents who pressure their young and innocent children ...
While there might be jobs that allow mothers to have their children with them, the work place is not an ideal environment for children. Preschools and day cares offer an alternative for working mothers. However, preschools and day cares are not an option for attachment parents. In an article titled, ?Guilt and the Working Mother,? Shirley Radl, the author, states that: There is absolutely no evidence to support the notion that children are damaged or deprived when their mothers work. Dr Mary Howell, a professor of pediatrics and associate dean of Harvard Medical School, studied 280 cases and concluded that the children of working mothers fared just as well as those of mothers who stayed at home all day. Another study, conducted in 1970 by Dr. Mary Elizabeth Keister of the University of North Carolina, revealed that day-care children studied from birth to five years were, if anything, slightly ahead of their peers, who were exclusively reared by their parents. (180-181) A principle part of growing up is learning separation and independence. A mother questioned by 20/20 believes, ?that attachment parenting will equip our children with the skills to meet the 21st century. Self-confidence, independence, high self-esteem, motivation. They?ll be able to do anything (3).
How can this be if the child is so dependent upon the adult? If the mother and father are always with the child, he or she never experiences decision making alone. The youth always expects the parent to be there for him or her, making every decision, but a part of life is making mistakes and learning from them. Children need to be put in environments that will cultivate their character. In Radl?s article she states that, ?numerous studies show that not only are children not damaged when their mothers work, but also they are likely to be well socialized if they go to preschool groups and are apt to be independent and make good adjustments when they enter regular school? (182).
Attachment parenting is nothing more than a trade off. Knowing where the children are and what they are doing at all times may be temporarily comforting but a has a high cost, producing extremely dependent adults. A child who experiences undivided attention from the parents may develop false beliefs about the outside world. The youth may expect everyone to treat him or her with the same degree of attention. In a world with billions of people, everyone gets overlooked. A large portion a healthy family is a successful marriage. Just as a child can suffer from lack of nurturing, so can the union between a husband and a wife. According to 20/20, ?Experts also worry about the psychological dangers?not to the kids but to the parents. Too much focus on the children and not enough on the marriage, they say inevitably leads to problems. And these parents reiterate that it takes a strong marriage to survive the demands of attachment parenting,? (6).
The Essay on Child/ parent relationship in the Little Boy Crying?
The poem, Little Boy Crying, written by Mervyn Morris is mainly about father and sons relationship. Poet shows the two main themes through this relationship; fathers love towards his child and his effort to lead his child into a right world in life. Mervyn Morris explores the child and parents relationship by using second person narration and language techniques such as allusion and emotive words. ...
Raising children in today?s society filled with violence, sex, and drugs is an extremely difficult job. Shaping these minds to face a ruthless world is a scary thought. But is attachment parenting the answer or is it just a radical approach? In a New York Times article: The psychologist Diana Eyer (the author of ?Mother ?Infant Bonding: A Scientific Fiction?) has made a career of denouncing attachment theory and its more simplistic variants as a new and ingenious version of an old game: pinning the blame on Mom when a child grows up insecure or worse. Placing too much emphasis on the early relationship between mother and child, she argues, allows society to abdicate responsibility for its role in shaping children. `Children are profoundly affected by an array of people who interact with them,? Eyer writes, `by the foods they eat, by the music they hear, by the television they watch, by the hope they see in the adult world and by the institutions- especially schools- they attend.? (28) For Eric Harris and Dylan Kleblod, how their parents raised them did not solely cause them to act out in such a violent manner. An array of issues triggered these young adults to respond viscously. As parents and aspiring parent, our primary objective is to provide our children with the tools to approach the world and to catch them when they fall, not to fight the world for them.
