I was reading the newspaper, when I came across the heading that ¨57% boys and 53% girls (in India) think that domestic violence is justified.¨
I read the heading three times until I was sure my mind was not playing tricks on me. It was a UNICEF survey so I couldn´t even complain to the editor for printing crap. At that point it was not possible for me to be more shocked until I came to know that the said survey was of 19-25 year old adolescents. On a good day, I am all like I love India, but at times like this I am ashamed to see the narrow mindedness we can have.
I could even get the 57% male, living in a patriarchal society and all, but 53% females. Is the self-esteem of these oh-so modern girls so low that verbal jabs from stupid people forces them to believe that in some sick, twisted way beating your wife is justified?
Domestic violence occurs mostly in dowry cases, which may end in suicide(murder) at times. According to me dowry is one of the crappiest custom that sadly still exist. Sometimes the victim is afraid to complain as it might degrade her family´s name, but for a second she has to think about the pain her family would go through if they come to know what she is going through.
A cousin of mine got arranged married in a dowry-hungry family and when her father came to know about what she is going through, he was ready to murder the whole family, but the girl trying to be the ever sacrificing woman resisted him from taking any step. The worst part is when her parents visit us and practically cry in worry. I can curse the girl for putting up with all that, but I don´t because until I am in her position, I don´t know what goes in her mind. Still it doesn´t soothes my anger at all. Obviously she doesn´t think what she is going through to be justified, but she feels helpless and that is a different thing than supporting domestic violence, I think.
Before I answer to this question, let me tell you a short story. Her friends describe Maria “as the perfect girl”. She is beautiful, she is working and she has many friends. However, Maria has many problems in her family. Her father is alcoholic and he is not working to feet his family. So, Maria and her mother are doing two or three jobs each in order to earn enough money to survive. Her father ...
The root of all this evil is the fear of society, the question ¨what people will think?¨ irritates me to no end. The foremost question a person should put is ¨What do I think?¨, ¨What do I feel?¨. Nothing is good when taken to extreme, not even altruism.