Divorce- Is it justified? By Kheyal Azam Khalil It is commonly believed that the consequences of ones actions are to be suffered by him alone. But divorce is an exception to that as the post-divorce problems are shared by the children as well. Every divorce is a result of unique circumstances and therefore it has varying consequences. However, it is a common observation that divorce usually has negative effects on children. In a family, every member has a sense of belonging which is, without doubt, incomparable to any other families. The effects of divorce depend on the relationship of parents and children in a particular family.
The fact that separation brings an inevitable sense of loss of a parent is very painful for the children as they want both of their parents to be there for them. Another thing that could cause this feeling is that some children like to see their parents living together in peace. In case of divorce, the parents stop living together and the family life is never the same. This dramatic change demands many adjustments and compromises that the children may not be prepared for. Hence this leads to increased stress. Moreover, living with a single parent usually results in economic hardships which affect the children practically as they are dependent on their parents.
Consequently the children feel deprived in every sense of the word. Whatever the causes of a divorce, it is always preceded by some events that lead up to it. This exposure to confrontations and/or bitter arguments is a source of constant anxiety for the children who continually try to normalise things between their parents. But they are disillusioned when all ends up in divorce. These children feel responsible for the separation and are morally degenerated because of guilt. After divorce the custody issue is very frustrating for the child as he/she is forced to choose to live with one of the parents.
The Term Paper on Custodial Parent Children Divorce Parents
DIVORCE: A BROKEN DREAM Divorce is now part of everyday American life. The effects of divorce are embedded in our laws and institutions, our manners and mores, our novels and children's storybooks, and our closest and most important relationships. Indeed, divorce has become so pervasive that many people naturally assume it has seeped into the social and cultural mainstream over a long period of ...
The option that the child actually wants i.e. to live with both the parents is what he/she does not have. On the other hand, in some cases, both the parents may not agree to or not be capable of taking custody of the children so then they have to be moved to foster homes. This may be disapproved by some children as they may feel alienated in the new environment. Living without parent/parents can result in early maturity of the children due to added responsibility and the absence of the parental care. Thus the children are unfairly robbed of their innocence.
This affects their personalities as they either may be prone to self-pity or become aggressive. Divorce being the failure of the mother and the father to commit is a bad example set for the children. The children may lose faith and become afraid of commitment or they may lose their sense of obligation -not considering it necessary to stay committed. Also as the things did not work out for the parents, the children may regard them as being fickle minded and become disrespectful. The children take the frequent fights of their parents as acts of immaturity and irrationality. The children living with their mothers are deprived of a disciplinarian and a head of the family in the shape of a father, whereas, the children living with their fathers miss out the unconditional motherly affection.
Nevertheless some children do get over this traumatic experience and compromise with their own respective situations. They, along with the others brought up by both parents, do excel in their fields as their progress is not necessarily stunted. But in their personalities, somewhere deep inside, there is a space left hollow that had long ago yearned to be a part of a picture perfect family..
