I’m sitting here wondering about life and why its so fucked up for me, What is wrong with me? ? I feel in so much pain and just want it all to end. The only good thing in my life is my girlfriend and she’s on WAP so I have never even met her but I do really love her which a lot of people don’t understand! Before, it was enough for me but it all changed a few days ago! I went on holiday and met this girl outside the cinema toilets. I was with my parents at the time so just eyed her up! But as soon as my parents were gone I went back there and started talking to her, she always wears baggy Tammy jeans and a slipknot hoodie, her name is Leanne. I handed out with her from 6: 30 pm to 1: 30 am! ! Me and her got on really well and she is bi and single! I really fancied her.
She has this addiction to sugar because it makes her hyper, she brought a bag of sugar and needed a spoon so I ran across to the joke shop and told her to stay there. I came back shortly with a spoon and gave it to her. She started to eat the sugar then the spoon bent and sugar went everywhere! ! ! The next day I met her in the club again and this time I sat with her family and was really bored! ! But then me and her went on the dance floor with all the little children. She kept doing the satan sign with her fingers when me and her were sat up against the wall of the dance floor and the children asked me what it means so I said that it means she just escaped from a mental hospital and believes she is a chicken! ! It was so funny! They also asked why she was hugging and laying against me and called us lezbo’s! I gave her a hug an she wouldn’t let go for about 10 mins! , but hey- who’s complaining! ! ! ! After the club I went back to hers and the only set backs were the fact that I had a girlfriend and she was fixated on this red coat Lisa! ! ! I started eating lip gloss and she said I was weird so I leaned over her and made her eat some lip gloss too! ! Then I got bored so covered her face and hands in lip gloss too! ! Then she kissed my hand and layed on the sofa with her head on my lap. Her hands started to move a bit too close to my tits so I put her hand back on my lap! I was over hers till about 4: 30 am! ! ! I really.
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really liked her and the next day was going to be our last xsobsx. I told my girlfriend I fancied Leanne and really hurt her yet again and I’m so not proud of that. That night I went to meet Leanne as normal but couldn’t find her so sat alone in the club. I had given up all hope of finding her, my girlfriend was hurt and upset, my parents hate me and I had enough of townies always having ago at me.
My life just seemed like a complete fucked up mess and I was so upset! I ran out of the club crying and was really depressed! I couldn’t face my parents so went and sat on the bin at the closed fair ground and cried and cried! ! I felt like such a fuck up! ! I went on WAP and talked to my girlfriend Emz, she was the only person who was there for me and she said she would always be there for me and she will never know how much that meant to me! ! She gave me the strength to go back in the toilets, clan myself up a bit and go back out and face the world again! ! But I was a really broken and scared little girl inside and I guess it showed! I walked back in the club hoping to see Leanne again but she wasn’t there so I decided to go for a walk to the beach, I got to the beach but it was closed and so I decided to go on a really long walk! I walked for about 2 or 3 hours not knowing where ther fuck I was going! ! I got lost but eventually found myself outside the club! It was so cold but my body was so numb from the pain that I couldn’t feel the intense coldness. I walked into the club and sat down alone. I saw some people looking at me because I was ‘different’. As I looked up on the dance floor I saw this girl with a slipknot hoodie on and automatically knew it was Leanne! This was a different club. I went up to her and straight away hugged me and asked me where I had been and said she was in that club because Lisa was there working. She then grabbed me and danced quite romantically but it was only to make Lisa jealous so I walked away and sat down.
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She started to do some break dancing and was a bit upset because Lisa said she was too young for her as she is only 14 and Lisa was 21. I got abit annoyed and went back to my flat to chat to emz, I realized that night how much I loved and wanted to be with my girlfriend. I guess I just wanted my girlfriend to be with me instead of miles away so I turned to Leanne. I knew I would never see Leanne again and decided to clear my head and go skating… I bumped into a few townies and they gave me a hard time so I skated off back to the apartment.
I sat there listening to AdeMa and drawing pictures about death and pain. I then literally ran outside in the rain and into the club. I then stalled before talking to her, I slowly walked over and said ‘hi’. She started talking about Lisa then talking to her family thinking I was going back over hers. She went into the toilets and I followed her and said I was going. She said I always go then I said bye and walked away and as I looked back she was standing there watching me leave.
I turned back round and walked away never to see her again, and she would never know how I really fell. I texted her a few times but not got a reply because her fone is fucked up. So all I got now is a picture of me and her together and all these great memory’s. But I know me and her will never ever meet again, but maybe that’s for the best because its my girlfriend emz who I am madly and deeply in love with, and I always will be and I love her more than she could ever imagine and can’t wait to marry her! ! I just wish I was with her now, but only distance keeps me and her apart, she will always be in my heart and sole, I love you babes! Just never forget that! ! ! xxxxxxxxxxx well, its just my story = , , , , (.
Love is when you can't stop thinking about her. Love is when you find yourselves holding hands and neither remembers initiating the contact. Love is when she comes over to your place and remembers a carton of milk for breakfast cereal. Love is when you find yourself having a great time clothes shopping, just because you're together. Love is when you get some great news or some sad news and the ...