Midlife Crisis: Myth? Imagine being forty or fifty and asking yourself questions like: What have I done all of my life? Why am I sitting behind a desk? And what am I doing driving a 1994 Grand Am, when I could be driving a BMW z 3? Then you come home and your partner says, ‘Honey, I set up and appointment for you to see Dr. Sherwood.’ and you reply ‘What for?’ Going through some a midlife transaction is common in men. From having symptoms, then coping with it, and getting professional help. In movies like: ‘Father of the Bride II” and ‘American Beauty’ going through a midlife crisis is glamorized, although in real life it is very painful and not as fun and not near as funny. But is it all a myth, a made up story? Piotr Oles defines, “The midlife crisis as… significant change in the self and…
men entering middle age. William Pollack, Ph. D. , a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and co-director of the Center for Men at McLean Hospital in Belmont, Massachusetts, states that “All men go through a midlife transition… but only some go through a midlife crisis” (O’Connor).
Symptoms usually occur in men between the ages of 40 and 50.
After all the children have grown up and left the house to pursue their own live, men feel like they are left behind (O’Connor).
Now it is only he and his wife, with feelings that their child may soon be taking care of them. Then it becomes common to wake up in the middle of the night and wonder to yourself, “Is there any more to life than this” (Adler).
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Toni Bernal, Ph. D. , a Beverly Hills, psychologist concluded: The things that had kept them working and kept the passion going are coming to and end.
Their spouses don’t seem as interesting to them as they once did, and they ” re facing years where all there is going to be is him and her (Adler).
A story in “Geriatrics” talked about one man’s experiences with midlife crisis and how he, “gained recent notoriety in the local newspaper when he was arrested for driving under the influence and lost his license” (Samuels).
Drinking is another symptom of a midlife crisis or how Gail H. O’Connor put it, “You become a happy-hour regular.” According to Steven Samuels, “About one in eight older adults have a problem related to alcohol abuse. One-third of them develop alcohol problems in late life that are related to the psychological stress of aging.” Along with midlife crisis come depression and anxiety. Steven Samuels wrote: Major depression in midlife is common, with a prevalence of approximately 2.
2%. The quality of life with depression has been found to be comparable to or worse than that of living with eight chronic medical conditions, including arthritis, diabetes, and severe coronary artery disease. The physical breaking down of the body can result in depression. This is when the number of regrets becomes overwhelming compared to the number of hopes (Adler).
Thinking back on the younger days when you could do anything, know you realize that there was so much that wasn’t done.
But it is too late to begin. Like trying to be a dancer or a professional football player. Ideas of achieving goals like these are nearly impossible at the age of fifty. O’Connor also explains that, “You may take unusual risks with your money.” Men feel like being a little risky when they are going through a midlife crisis. It is uncommon for a man to get urges of fly to Las Vegas and gamble, to want to make a career change, or start their own company (Adler).
When going through all these changes men may want to look younger, to help them feel younger. They may try things like a taupe, hair plugs, dying the hair so it isn’t gray, growing a goatee, or even getting an earring (Adler).
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But this is all short-term. In the mind, looking young is being young. And if a man is young he will be able to achieve things that were never achieved before.
“Suicide risk increases with age in adult males” (Samuels).
Instead of receiving professional help men tend to turn to other methods of treatment. Like the ones stated previously. In “Midlife Crisis: Helping Patients Cope with Stress, Anxiety, and Depression” Samuels tells John’s story.
After his wife died he did exactly this. One year after his wife’s passing he met his current wife Lizzie. This was John’s way of coping with his midlife depression (Samuels).
He tries to deny all symptoms. Men may feel like they need to “self medicate” themselves to try alleviate the symptoms. With alcohol, Cocaine, marijuana, methamphetamine’s, and barbiturates middle age men try to escape reality of their pain (Samuels).
All this does is hide the root problem. It doesn’t solve anything. There is many safe professional ways to help deal with this disorder. First there is always ways to relieve stress: Daytime exercise may relieve stress and improve the quality sleep, as may relaxation exercises such as yoga, meditation, visual imagery, and listening to soothing music. White noise machines may assist patients in falling asleep and staying asleep (Samuels).
Antidepressants are also and option. Depression is very common today. Not only in middle aged men, but also in adolescent teens, and women. It is easily treated and able to keep in control. After all of this research and internal team of twelve social and biomedical scientists concluded that the whole midlife crisis is a large myth (Kalter).
The John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur foundation Research Network on Successful Midlife Development-which has interviewed some 15, 000 people over the course of nearly eight years, trying to distinguish truth from rumors and just what happens to adults in middle age (Kalter).
These symptoms can happen at any age. There little evidence that crises happen more during middle age (Kalter).
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When men are middle aged they tend to be at their happiest. Their homes are paid for. Children are grown and they now have no responsibilities. Now they don’t have to come home to children and their problems. They now have what they have worked for and they can enjoy it (Kalter).
Depression is at its lowest during these years.
“People today are happiest at the age of fifty” (Kalter).
There are even people that decide to have another child at this time. “Studies show that men today also feel most positive in midlife” (Kalter).
Kalter also explains, “While there’s clearly no midlife crisis for most of us, there are certainly midlife transitions. Physical aging, a child’s college graduation, the plateau of a career-all bespeak mortality.” A midlife crisis is a terrible thing to go though. But there is many ways to control it and contain it.
When a man enters middle age they realize that they are with a partner that truly loves them, and will continue to love them forever. They understand that it is not the end of the world and that there is plenty of life to live and learn. Only about one or two percent actually go through a true crisis (Kelter).
At the age of fifty men are still watching their football, playing with there child relatives, and loving their partners. Works Cite dO ” Connor, Gail H.
, “Detour Ahead: Eight Warning Signs You ” re Cruising for a Midlife Crisis.” Men’s Health May. 1998: Health Reference. Infotrac. Hudson Valley Community College. Troy. 2 March 2001< web Steven C.
“Midlife Crisis: Helping Patients Cope with Stress, Anxiety, and Depression.” Geriatrics July 1997: Health Reference. Infotrac. Hudson Valley Community College. Troy. 2 March 2001. Adler, Jerry.
“One Man’s Midlife Crisis.” Good Housekeeping May 1998: Health Reference. Infotrac. Hudson Valley Community College. Troy.
22 March 2001 Oles, Piotr K. “Towards a Psychological Model of Midlife Crisis” Psychological Reports 84 (1999): 1059-1069 Kalter, Joan Marie. “Midlife Crisis? Fear Not!” New Choices Feb. 1997: Wilson Web.
Infotrac. Hudson Valley Community College. Troy. 22 march 2001< web.