How I Felt About Being the Only Child People often think that those who were the only children in their families grow up to be egoists. It is a common opinion that those, who were raised in an atmosphere of undivided attention and love become self-centered, spoilt people with no ability to appreciate anybody else but themselves. It is also believed that the only children often fail in building their own families because they have absolutely no experience of sharing and compromising. I do not think that this is true, however. Many great people, such as Martin Luther for example, were the only children of the family and yet, the humanity even now remembers them for the remarkable things they have done. I am the only child of my parents.
I had been never deprived of anything and was the center of the whole universe for my parents. When I was growing up I was not realizing how much they were doing for me. Sometimes I had big fights with them and wished to get out of their house and go to college sooner. I thought they were unfair and mean when they put curfews and cut on my pocket money. Such an attitude towards my parents was probably due to my age. Teenagers often want to seem cool, and telling your friends about how horrible your parents are, is a big part of it.
Also, at 15 or 16 people live by the only here and now philosophy, which means that even the smallest thing seems to be the end of the world to them. Nevertheless, even at crisis moments of relationships with my parents, I loved to spend time with them. We used to go on picnics to the park or just make barbeques in the backyard on Saturdays. We were always spending summer breaks and holidays together. It was amazing to feel how my parents planned all their lives around me. When I was little they were fighting over who would give me a bath or play with me. Then, they were competing in giving me the best toy for birthday. Now we are emailing each other every day telling what is going on.
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Each of one of us in our family had a separate unique role. My mom was always making the house comfortable and cozy. She was taking care of my father and me, and I think we both perfectly knew that the life would be impossible without her. My mom was helping me with the homework and it was amazing how she managed to make the most difficult things so easy for me. My dad was very good at giving me advice both when I asked for it and when I did not. We used to sit in the kitchen and he would tell me about politics and economics, would call for my opinions and judgments.
This definitely contributed greatly to my mental development and ability to analyze events. I have to admit that there were times when I felt lonely. I remember myself wishing to have a brother or a sister. I was dreaming that if I had a big brother, he would stand for me at school and bring his friends home. If I had a sister, I would take care of her and protect her. I liked the idea of being respected and looked up to by someone. Sometimes, I would even ask my parents why do not they buy a sibling for me, and they would smile and tell me that I would find when I grow up.
Really, when I grew up I understood why my parents had just one child. They probably wanted to give all their knowledge, time and attention to one person in whom they have put great hopes. In the animal world, the healthiest and strongest are those that were the only ones in their litter. This, I think, can be applied to people as well. The more children there are in the family, the less financial and physical ability parents have to provide each child with the equal amount of love, patience, experience and happiness. Moreover, the only children are more likely to become independent and confident early because they have to rely on themselves only when they are among their peers.
However, the final decision about whether the child to be the only in the family is always up to the parents..
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