Coming out of a much overpriced Shell gas station off of the 101 freeway past Bakersfield and in the middle of nowhere dwells the beast Drive up to Stanford. The Drive up to Stanford, also known as DUS, wasn’t always this huge beast. No he used to be pleasant man; he would let people drive up and down the 101 freeway passing his shell station, even let them come to his shell station and buy gas and food. He was always nice like this up until Stanford University opened up in 1891 then DUS became this horrible beast killing and ripping the dead corpses of many college students and professors from Stanford who drive near his Shell station.
DUS only goes after the college students and professors of Stanford because ever since Stanford opened there have been wild parties there. Lot’s of students would get messed at these crazy parties and decide to swerve there cars all the way to his overpriced Shell station and they would crash into it. They would always trip out about the big, spinning yellow shell floating in mid-air. So now DUS would use his super spidey senses to pick out the Stanford people driving by so he could brutally mutilate them as they pass. DUS was as big as the Hulk, with two huge pointed horns on his head. He had a bigger 8 pack than the Situation and his arms were 10 feet around. He had one of the ugliest faces ever with no ears, 3 different sized eyes going across his face and his mouth foamed like a rabid dog when he got angry.
The Royal Dutch Shell PLCThe ‘energy' market is an ever booming and ever evolving one in many countries. The impact that energy fuel has on the varying economies of the world is to a large extent due to the fact that ‘OIL' and any other fossil fuel is regarded as one of the most precious commodities of this planet which determines fluctuations in currencies, economies, political systems, and ...
In the year 2009 the University noticed a drastic decrease in the number of not only their preppy students attending but also the number of their professors also decreased. The professors who traveled on the 101 freeway especially were not showing up to work. Nobody on campus knew of this horrific monster, DUS, because there were no witnesses or survivors to tell the story. Since there was nobody left traveling north on 101 to get to school DUS could no longer mass massacre these kids going to school. Because there was nobody coming from Southern California, Stanford had to take more and more out of state students, who would not travel on the 101 to get to school. The only thing about these out of state kids is they would go to these parties and end up crashing into DUS’ gas station so he began to get outraged again. He just wanted to be left alone.
DUS finally had a plan to drive everybody away from him. He decide he would play music so loud that it could be heard all the way from San Francisco down to LA and at the epicenter was so powerful, it could rip your clothes off. It had a base so low that it shook all of California with the beat. DUS figured since he had no ears, it wouldn’t affect him but it would drive everyone else away so he could be alone.
DUS decided to put some rap music so he could really use the monstrous base that he had. The moment he pressed play, everyone in California could feel the beat to Kanye West (just kidding because nobody listens to Kanye West it was really Atmosphere.) The only problem was it had the opposite effect because everyone started coming towards him because they liked his beats. They would all come to dance at his shell station because it was easy to go with the beat. DUS didn’t know what to do he was murdering these people in waves. He even changed the music to rock, dance, pop, country, but there were always people who knew how to dance to it. He couldn’t keep up with all of these waves of people, he was already tearing hundreds to shreds every day and it was exhausting him.
Music is an outlet to all aspects of life and has a significant way of forming people and the way they live. Although not always seen directly, culture has an overbearing influence on the music that is produced and made popular. The political climate of the early seventies was full of fire with issues such as Vietnam and constant protest throughout the Unites States. Social issues also played a ...
Finally he put in the last kind of music he could, house music. house music is an extreme form of techno and it was having a weird affect on all of the people. It was like the beat was beating them up, and they couldn’t beat back. These crazy beats from the house music was beating people up all over California, in some cases, beating them to death. The press was all over this case and it was making Obama look bad. Obama had nowhere else to turn but to call me in. I was the only one who knew how to beat the beat back. I was flown into Arizona where there was no shock wave, and from there driven in as close to the epicenter as they could go. These military men drove me up to about 50 yards from the center of this mass destruction, but at this range the beats were too crazy for them so they started projectile vomiting all over the car. So I just got out because it started to smell really bad.
DUS had no idea what was coming, he was just relaxing on his rainbow lawn chair when suddenly he saw a person come into site. It was me, he couldn’t see what I was doing at this distance, but as I got closer he realized that I was coming in a very fast pace. And what else would I have been doing besides beating up his crazy beats. Even though I came in fist pumping like a champ I was still taking a pretty hard beating from it. It was an all out beating war; I was getting hit by his beats as well as beating them up. DUS just stood off to the side because he didn’t want to get hit in this beat war.
Finally after hours of just working up this beat and fist pumping his gigantic beat box exploded sending smoke and fire everywhere. In no time his beat box was nothing but a Texas sized inferno. DUS was completely disoriented and that’s when the military swooped in shooting and dropping bombs on him. As I was making my slow motion escape through the fire the whole gas station exploded and I just so happened to be exactly out of range of the explosion, but I was close enough that I had to dive. Once the smoke cleared, every news station was there and I was on every channel in the world and I was nominated king of the world. So I now sit in my huge office and just fist pump like a chance with my friend Vinny.
To trace the origins of today?s house music, one needs to time travel back to the 80?s, following a bizarre trail that spans the Atlantic ocean, hits the Mediterranean dance floors of Ibiza, sneak into the backdoors of New York?s recording studios, and have V.I.P. passes to the clubs of Chicago and London. Since we can?t deliver any of that, here?s a brief retelling of the birth of modern dance ...