It’s a Bio-Psycho-Social Disease
The worst day of my life, was after a dangerous relapse, having to leave within 48 hours to Atlanta for three months, and not being able to go home, see my kids or my wife. “My family was so pissed at me this time, I had to find my own ride to the Airport….it was the most helpless, fearful, time of my life!”
James, (as I will refer to him), is a very friendly, easy going, honest and caring person I have met in quite some time. I found him to be highly intelligent, very well spoken, yet humble and down to earth. As you look at him, you can’t help notice how nicely he dresses, and confidence he portrays. James is a son, brother, husband, father, businessman and a “recovering alcoholic/drug addict”. When he was just 13 years old he had his first alcoholic drink while hanging with friends, because it was a way to fit-in and be cool. He wasn’t use to living in an affluent community, so he started “running with the crowd” which meant booze, drugs and mayhem. This was no outlet for James, he knew he drank/drugged alcoholically from the start.
James was born in Searcy, Arkansas to Fred and Mary, and had one older sister Janet. When he was 7 the family moved to New York City where he made friends quickly and lived a pretty normal life. At age 12, his parents decided to move once again, to an upscale town called Pittsford, NY, where they opened a business. “Moving from the West Side to the East Side as a
The Essay on Paper About Life Time Mother Times
The Longman dictionary of American English defines life as, the force that enables us to continue. Life in my eyes is the interval of time between birth and death. Throughout life you will be placed in situations, and put to the test of time. There will be times when you are joyous, and times when you are sorrowful. This is the period of trial and tribulation. Face the fact life is hard. Being an ...
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7th grader, was a MAJOR adjustment”! Trying to fit in with all the rich kids was not easy at 12, so he became a follower in order to fit-in, and soon the others were following him.
In high school he was the “popular guy”. Vice president of his class, a B student, captain of the hockey team, and had the perfect cheerleader girlfriend. But things spiraled out of control at the start of his junior year. On weekends while at parties, and before his rock band would play, he and his buddies would do cocaine and drink, and by the time he was a Senior, he was putting Sun Country Wine Cooler alcohol in his Mountain Dew cans he took to school..
After graduating in 1985, James attended Hartwick College, but failed out his sophomore year. He had joined a fraternity which fueled his addiction issues –“I drank 7 days a week, and did cocaine as much as I could – it was a disaster!!” Finally, in 1989 he was forced to seek help and went to an outpatient rehab, where he remained sober for about 3 years. During that time, he met Missy, now his wife, at a local bar/restaurant on the lake near his cottage. They would marry in 1995.
James had been working for one of his father’s companies, and became very successful in growing the business. He was so driven to succeed and afraid of failing, that he started running the other two businesses as well, wanting to prove he was worthy, and making his family proud.
In 1999, his first son, Trent was born, “the happiest day of my life”, he said, and three years later another Son, Tyler was born. James continued to stay sober for the first part of boys’ lives, and his success continued which led him to make a lot of money, running with the socially
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elite crowd. “I was so driven to succeed, that I tried to run them all – success is relative I guess — I made lots of money, but it about killed me”.
In 2003, Jams had surgery on his shoulder and was put on painkillers. With the stress of running three business’, flying 200,000+ miles a year all over the world, and being on the road
200 nights/year, was more than he could handle. “Once they put me on painkillers it was off to the races I went” and that’s when I started going back out on my prolonged relapse, he said.
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Rock bottom was now sitting in! His routine consisted of waking up, eating pills, drinking, and figuring out where to get more before going to bed, not caring where he woke up in the morning. When I asked how this affected his kids, in a choked up voice, he answered, “I was horrible – scaring the living shit out of them, and even would drive them around loaded on benzos (Xanax).” His addiction M.D. and spouse intervened as they knew he was in a very dangerous place. He was given 48 hours to get himself to the airport to a rehab center in Atlanta, where he would stay for 3 months.
Today, James is sober once again. He’s a retired entrepreneur, but still serves on the board of directors of his companies. He is a full-time student studying CDC and Social Work. “I hope to give back, as I’m a very fortunate soul”, he says a very serious, sincere manner.
As for his family, his Father retired in 1983, and his mother has been battling cancer for 8+ years; living out her days on her terms, drinking and taking painkillers. She continues to be the gatekeeper and making bank deposits, “so she can have a pulse on the business and keep her mind of her cancer misery”. In terms of their relationship, James avoids being around her in the afternoons and evenings, but no intervening in the future he says. As for his sister, they have
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become relatively close, now that “the wreckage I left behind has been put back together”. He is enjoying every day with his wife and kids, and now wakes up in the morning and meditates, has a healthy breakfast, says a prayer, and enthusiastically takes on the day, finishing with an AA or NA meeting. Later in the evening, he spends quality time with his family, going to his son’s hockey practices and games, and best of all “I go to bed not feeling guilty – looking forward to tomorrow”.
The most important thing James believe people should know and understand about alcoholics, is that “we are not gutter drunks”. Those of us in recovery are productive, capable, spiritual members of society. It is a Bio-Psycho-Social Disease, with no cure. But with a good recovery program, anyone can be put into remission. It’s a difficult, long, but very rewarding journey, and the most difficult challenge one will face is you must change only “one thing…….EVERYTHING!” But it will renew your faith.
The Essay on The Theme Of Paralysis In Eveline By James Joyce
... Paralysis in Eveline by James Joyce Eveline is a short story in James Joyces series Dubliners. When ... toast for her at the fire. Another day, when their mother was alive, they had ... a description of one day in the girls life, not ordinary day, though, but fate defining. ... (http://www.online-literature.com/james_joyce/959/ ) Selected Letters of James Joyce. Ed. Richard Ellmann. New York: Viking, 1975..
