Families

Chapter 2

An understanding of the roles that some of the key players in a child’s family system help professionals whom work with them to interact with them in sensitive and emphatic manner

Mothers

Role of mothers

5“Although mothering is often considered to be “instinctual and natural” the roles have changed over time and differ across culture” thus making it a highly diverse role.

6Employment is considered the most prevalent issue affecting mothering today.

7In 2006, 80 percent of married Canadian women work

8Debate around if women should or should not work.

9Woman’s attitude more important than the “experts’ opinion”

10Focus needs to be on how mothers can be supported by their employers providing flexibility in schedules and “return to work” options and by the provision of flexible high quality day care

11Society presents the unrealistic image of “supermom”

12Role is often impacted by multiple stressors

13Key stressor is the “time crunch”

o Lack of time to fulfill tasks and requirements

o Results in guilt and frustration

o Daly – suggests it is a function of a “hurried society”

Attitudes toward mothers

14Societal attitudes toward mothers are vast and diverse.

15Exercise on the top of page 29

16Our assumptions are often based on our own experience and thus we should be careful not to generalize our beliefs

The Essay on "My Mother Never Worked" By Bonnie Smith-Yackel

Women in today’s society have a much louder voice; meaning they have more respect, and are greatly appreciated for what they do, compared to Yackel’s 1975 essay. Bonnie Smith-Yackel’s essay makes a statement about how society values, and appreciates women and the way they work dating back to the 1920’s. Most things having to do with women working or anybody for that matter ...

17Nature and relationships between mother and their child is extremely diverse

Preparation for Motherhood

18In North America many women have no experience with babies even those that delay childbearing

19Shiela Kitzinger – suggest that there is a “value conflict” – the instrumental skills (task and product focused) valued in western societies are not those that meet the requirements of parenting – that of being open and responsive to children ever changing needs.

20Instrumental skills lead to the timelines and schedules inherent to today’s hurried families

21Motherhood does not fit into a neat predetermined plan because the child is constantly changing and developing – the child does not know or care about the “plam”

Role ambiguity

22The role of mother is changing and will continue to be influenced by social and economic factors beyond the families control

23Society bombards mothers with mixed message. If working, stay home; if home, work.

24While there should be many possible ways to parent a child, ambiguity often leads to feelings of stress.

25Childhood professions can inadvertently add to the stress and guilt that mothers feel; therefore important to recognize and empathize with the stressors that mothers are faced with

o The caregiver belief that parents should be with their children unless forced to work can perpetuate feelings of quilt and inadequacy in the mothers that they serve

Mothers and experts

26The belief in the “expert” can also make mother’s feel inadequate and more stressed and guilty

27Experts tend to disagree

28For every argument a counterargument can be found

29Many authorities now recognizing the importance of empowering mothers (i.e. asset/strength based programs)

30Especially relevant in our diverse society where there a many ways to do the same thing right

Fathers

31Role of father changed drastically in our society

32Moving closer to the current ideal of men being equal partners in child-rearing

33In the past research focused on the absence of fathers and its negative impact on the family system

34Recently, there has been a positive move towards looking at father not as they compare to mothers but as a separate phenomenon

The Essay on Gwen Harwood “Father and Child”

The poem “Father and Child” by Gwen Harwood shows Harwood’s father teaching her the concepts of life and death, from when she is a young child in “Barn Owl” up to when she is around forty at the time of his death in “Nightfall”, coming to accept the idea that life is not never-ending. In part one called “Barn Owl”; she has learnt to accept death as a component of life. The persona of the poem ...

35Industrial revolution drew fathers out of the home, prior to that time fathers played an important role in the moral education and skill-training of their children

36Social changes (forced out of the job market/divorce/remarriage) has caused fathers to assume other responsibilities, other than simply that of “provider”, either voluntarily or involuntarily

37The most notable change is the number of fathers that do not live with their children

38Concept of father is more complex as a result of divorce and remarriage

39Expectations have changed. Fathers are expected to do front line parenting, housework, or stay at home and they are equally competent as mothers

o Role shifts and reversal are often difficult for many families

40Although mothers and fathers tend to interact with their children differently neither way need be considered better or worse, simply different

41Fathers involvement is often overly appreciated while a mother’s role is taken for granted

42No recipe for a good or bad father/mother, families have to evolve into their own patterns and norms

Supporting fathers

43Some men complain of the “mothering double standard/gate keeping” – although women complain that men do not participate enough in child-rearing they are hesitant to let go and allow men to take part

44ways how society can support fathers (pg. 36 -37)

45 McBride article

Siblings

4680 percent of CNDs have at least one sibling

47Siblings may influence child-development more than parents as a result of the time spent together

48Although parents play a role in fostering positive sibling relationship many factors affect the relationship

o Birth order

 Oldest – high achiever

 Middle child – secretive and rebellious though more social than oldest

 Last born – charmer

 Like any single factorial theory, birth order, may be too simplistic as multiple factors affect development – gender, age spacing, peer and school experiences, accidents, illness, random events, and economic factors

The Essay on Divorce Children Father Parents

Divorce A divorce is something that no family member wishes to go through, especially if they have children together. However, in today s society more people are going through divorce. Many people separate because they are not getting along with each other and have had many difficulties trying to reside with each other, or they have just found someone else. Whatever the case may be divorce is a ...

o Family size

 Children from large families tend to do poorer than those from small families due to the “dilution of parental resource”

 Although there are positives such as these children being more affectionate, good leaders, less prone to depression and more cooperative

 Likewise spacing also seems to have an impact on development. With longer spaced children (4yrs +) faring better than their closer spaced counterparts

 Research on only children offers mixed messages

How do siblings affect each other?

49Act as role models both positively and negatively

50Negative outcomes more prevalent in single mother-homes

o may be due to the presence of more stressors than in other family forms

51Less negativity among half-sibs than full sibs

o may be due to a less intense emotional bond and to lowered expectations

52Not surprisingly, positive relations connected to the degree of parental warmth and involvement

Parents’ role in facilitating healthy sibling relations

53No formula

54Focusing on communication more helpful that treating all children the same

55Handling sibling rivalry (pg 40)

Grandparents

5679% of all adults over the age of 65 are grandparents

57Average grandparent has 4.7 grandchildren

58An increasing number of grandparents are taking on the care of their grandchildren

59role like all is affected by cultural norms and expectations

Chapter 3

Family development

60Families change and grow over time; some of these changes are predictable

61Carter and McGoldrick have divided the “typical” family cycle into 7 stages

62Stages typical attach to a developmental task/transition and highlight the possible feature and complications of each stage

Carter and McGoldrick

63Leaving home/single young adult

64Beginning/The new couple

o Period of exploration, discovery, excitement, and happiness

o Adjustment to spouses family and friends

65The arrival of children

o True beginning of family life

The Essay on Korean Society Family Children Parents

The Difference in Traditional and current Korean Family Structure The traditional Korean Society retains a strong Confucian tradition, which is clearly manifested in the strong devotion to the family. This tradition combined with the passionate nature of Koreans can perhaps explain strong loyalties felt between relatives, co-workers, classmates, and friends. This is all true of Korean society ...

o Most significant transition of family life cycle

o Reorganization and addition of roles

o Often a decline in marital satisfaction due to multiple stressors (emotional, physical, financial, etc)

o Rewards (affection, purpose, commitment)

66The family with young children

o Mother preoccupied with children; father with work

o Misunderstanding of roles can produce tension

o Pressure cooker (families attempt to balance child care, household duties, financial pressures, and often full time employment)

o Time crunch

o Families ability to manage these stressors mediated by multiple factors including supportive work environments

67The family with school age children

o Some mothers may feel less needed

o Some women may go back to work

o Fathers may feel pushed away

o Childcare may become more of a challenge due to shorter school days

68The family with adolescents

o Everybody is busy with their own things

o Parents need to make adjustments in their relationships with their children

o Navigate their children’s process of separation and individualization

o Little opportunity for communication

69 The family with older children (launching period)

o Growing trend for children to launch later primarily due to SES factors

o Empty nest can be embraced by some and feared by others as the marriage regains focus

o Parents can be responsible for their children, their children’s children and their ageing parents al lat the same time

70The older family

o The family in later and their children’s new lives/children while managing their own aging and issues of mortality

family development in Non-traditional families and from a multicultural perspective

o Few families fit the above model

o Changing economic and social forces influence family development

 Development differs in two income homes, single parent homes, blended families, delayed parenthood etc

o Cultural membership also influence family development

The importance of understanding family life development

The Coursework on Development Theory

... is the Contextual theory. Contextual theory explains the development wherein the recent or various context of a certain person’s life influences her ... and considered major cultural events that shaped the lives of families and children is the event when the world trade center ... were still a part of their everyday lives. Like for example, those children whose parents died because of that event are ...

71Normalizes family stressors and puts families at ease

72Helps families prepare for upcoming transitions

73However must bear in mind the diverse possibilities in which families can pass through these stages and that this theory focuses primarily on problems and challenges.

74Important to recognize reward inherent to each stage

o Cultural ceremonies

Transitions in Parenting

75Parenting involves a “continuation of interactions between parent and child” – a process that changes both

76Parenting involves change in all aspects of ones life; changes are impacted by social, emotional, cultural and economic factors

77Perspective recognizes that parenting involves parent development as well as child development

78Ellen Galinsky formulated a model describing the stages of parenting

1. Image making (pregnancy)

 Parent thinks and forms images about the child and parenting

2. Nurturing (0-2)

 Parent compares child and parenting ideals with reality

3. Authority (2- 5)

 Parent decide how strict or permissive to be, what rules they need to set, how to set them, and what to do when broken

4. Interpretive (6-12)

 Parents are concerned about the appropriateness of their parenting (i.e. rules, strictness, and permissiveness) as it impacts their child’s self esteem during these years. They worry about how to answer their children questions and what value, knowledge, and skills to pass on

5. Independent (teen years)

 Parent are still concerned about the appropriateness of their parenting (i.e. rules, strictness, and permissive) as it impacts their child’s self esteem however, the answers they now need are different then the ones needed in the above stage

6. Departure (child leaves home)

 Parent evaluates their effectiveness by judging if their ideal of their child fits with reality. Sense of subjective well-being is attached to this judgement

The Essay on Child Development Theories 2

While theorists have different ideas and perspectives, insight on child and adolescent development can assist teachers and parents in helping children reach their full developmental and learning potential. Having knowledge about the development of a child and adolescent provides clues in understanding behavior and what is “normal,” or typical, in growth and development in the early ...

Theories of Individual development (pp.55-61)

79Look at theories that explain aspects of development to help adults understand young children and their impact on the family unit.

1. Erikson’s psychosocial development

2. Piaget’s cognitive development theory

3. Bowlby’s attachment theory

80Erik Erikson’s theory of psychosocial development (not free of gender and culture bias)

81Theory explains children’s understanding of themselves and the world

82Trust vs. mistrust (infancy)

83Autonomy vs. shame or doubt (toddler hood)

84Initiative vs. guilt (preschool)

85Industry vs. inferiority (school age)

86Identity vs. role confusion (adolescence)

87Intimacy vs. isolation (young adulthood)

88Generativity vs. stagnation (middle-adulthood)2

89Ego-integrity vs. despair (late-adulhood)

Development in the Early Years

90Jean Piaget’s theory of cognitive development

91Sensorimotor (0-2)

92Preoperational (2-6)

93Concrete- operational (6-11)

Attachment (pp. 63-64)

Attachment theory

94The process of developing a trusting bond and relationship with primary/secondary caregivers

Interaction/overlap of Developmental Cycles

The development of the child, of parenting skills and the family does not happen in isolation. The develop in tandem and impact on another.

Tasks of all family members overlap

95Family life cycle tasks

96Parenting cycle tasks

97Psychosocial developmental cycle tasks