An analysis and interpretation of: “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior”. An article written by the 48 years old Amy L. Chua (or 蔡美儿 in Chinese) who was born in Champaign, Illinois. Her parents were Chinese Filipinos and that’s where she got her parenting style from.
To start of with, Amy Chua asks the question that has crossed most people’s minds: “ How do they do it? How does the Chinese parents produce all these “math wizzes” and “music prodigies”? Amy makes it clear that the Asian kids are not born smart (For the most part, at least) It is hard work and training from the parents that shapes the children into these wonder kids. To prove her point she lists up a number of things that her daughter were never allowed to do, such as: * Have a play date
* Watch television or play computer games
* Attend a school play
* Complain about not in a school play
And so on..
Prohibitions that seems totally unreasonable for us “westerns”, as she loosely has named us. Throughout the text she covers several perspectives on parenting, which of a few I surprisingly agree on. Most of her viewpoints I deeply disagree with though and is far from my idea about proper parenting. Each time she lists up one of her perspectives, she compares the Chinese perspective with the Western perspective. She does this in a very subjective manner I think. She is very clever rhetorically. At some parts of the text, I actually caught my self being very close to getting dragged towards her side. I found it quite amusing to feel the power of pathos, but at the same time a bit daunting.
The Term Paper on Parenting in Diverse Cultures
Culture may influence child activities and behaviors through the organization of the physical and social settings of every day life. Social as well as cultural norms, values, and conventions can direct and control the child’s behavior through the progression of social evaluation. Throughout childhood and preadolescence, due to children’s particular need for peer assimilation and ...
According to Amy, the main difference between Chinese parents and Western parents is the way they see their children. Western parents believe that respecting their children’s choices, their individuality and always encouraging them to pursue their true passions is the way. In contrast, Chinese parents believe that preparing their children for the future, and showing them what they are capable of, in the form of hours of repetition and very high expectations, is the way for their children to get a good life. Which in common Chinese sense means a good job, so the boy/girl can take care of their parent when they grow old.
Even though Amy admits that her parenting methods may be tough at first, she insists that it will all pay off in the end, but is that entirely true? The answer to that is generally no. Of course there are some children who can handle all the pressure and failure, and will grow up to be extremely successful and confident, but the majority can’t. In fact China is nr. 6 on the “Wikipedia list of countries by suicide rate” Which means that per.100.000 people in China 22.23 people commit suicide. Compared to Denmark (Nr. 36), where the number is substantially lower at 11.9 and where the Western parenting style is the dominant. A coincidence? I do not think so. As Amy points out in her article, she does not believe in individuality and I am certain that Amy is not the only one who feels that way. There are several studies showing that not everyone handles stress identically and that is displayed in this statistic.
As I stated earlier I agree on a few on her viewpoints. An example could be that “What parents understand is that nothing is fun until you’re good at it” I agree on this as well as “there’s nothing better for building confidence than learning you can do something you thought you couldn’t” I agree on these two quotes, but still think that her general parenting style is too strict. There is specifically one thing that she is taking away from her children that I do not get. The social aspect of a childhood. No doubt that using Amy’s techniques will lead to some academically strong children, but they will end up having a low social capital, and a big lack in social skills.
Not being functional socially could end up costing them big job opportunities, because their lack of social functionality could strike them down, when for instance going to a job interview. So in the end the children might end up not getting a good job, because their parents took away their chance for developing some social skills. By that they won’t be able to take care of their parent, because they won’t be able to earn enough money. Which would mean that all those hours at home, practicing and repeating, is going to end up being wasted time, because the kid can’t take those abilities out in real life.
The Term Paper on Cultural Differences in Parent-Child Communication
Today’s children face more diversity than their parents were when they were at the same age. The cultural differences in how the parents deal and communicate with their children around the world are a great challenge. Parent’s involvement in their children’s literacy and communication either in school, home or community will be effective through communication strategies and awareness about ...
By taking away their freedom and space for creativity you are basically turning your children into little machines. They will get extremely good at doing what they are told, but once they are asked to work something out for themselves, for instance producing a design for something, they will have no clue what to do.
I am not a fan of Amy L. Chua’s methods but I do think that us ‘westerns’ could take small things from her and apply to our parenting. But as well as we can learn from her, she can definitely also learn from us.
I want to finish my essay of with a quote I feel reflects my perspective on parenting very well. As Anne Frank once said:
“Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.”
